What can I say? I am continuing to strengthen my knowledge of the fact that I know I am in the right place. I head to Panama in just over a week...and although my Español is still pretty weak...and the conversation while getting my hair cut this morning was one of the most awkward ever... I am so excited to go. A lot of the conversational Español can only be learned out in the field...regardless...I have faith that everything will go exactly how its supposed to go. I have had so many random trials already thrown at me...which constanly remind me that I am doing the right thing. The stronger my testimony grows, the harder the Adversary works against me...which just makes me work harder, and become stronger in the process, jaja. Trials have nothing against you if you don`t give them power. One thing that we all have power over is how we overcome trials, and if we overcome them. We have so much power within ourselves...I love that I have been able to realize that. Sometimes it is hard...I am not going to lie. Life at the CCM is not all peaches and cream...for the most part, its absolutely amazing! But there are some days when you leave your umbrella in the classroom, and you are in the comedor...so you run through the rain in a white shirt, soak your shoes, and hair. You get a second shower for the day. And ten minutes later, you go to teach a lesson about the gospel of Jesus Christ....and you forget that you were freezing a few minutes before hand. Some days, like yesterday, you lose your bag with your licence, money, journal, and temple recommend...and you have to keep going.
Regardless of how currently worried I am about my missing things...I know that I will be okay. My companion said while I was having a moment of weakness (yeah I have those) that she knows the Lord will provide those things again somehow...because they are necessary for me to successfully serve. Which is true. Things will be provided for me somehow. Jaja, I keep thinking about a story that I heard about a missionary a few weeks ago...within his first Sunday out on his mission, he ripped his only suit beyond repair, crashed his bike, and had all of his money stolen. In the process of his mission, his dad become a member of the Church. So...just think about things this way...when trials happen, just expect something wonderful to happen because of it. You may not even realize the blessing recieved due to your trial of faith...but it will occur. I am already recognizing evidence of that in my life out here...So I am expecting something amazing to happen for someone due to this particular trial! Jaja.
Life is a beautiful thing...we are all given the wonderful opportunity to choose for ourselves what path we will take...we are given the priviledge to learn, to grow, to meet life long friends, to create families...to learn to believe in ourselves and what we are capable of. I love my life. I get to do so many wonderful things here in Mexico, and then in Panama...and who knows what awesome things are in store for me after my mission. The next 17 months (yeah, I have already been out for a month, guys!) is only the beginning...its like the refiner`s fire, as one of my friends said, that helps me become who I need to be for the rest of my life. There will be trials, and there will be days, as there already have been, when I fall down to my knees and ask for help. Ask to be made stronger, ask for blessing for those back at home that I can`t simply ask how they are doing...ask for experiences that will make me the best missionary and daughter of God that I can possibly be.
For those of you that read this...thank you so much for taking the time to do so. I love being able to share my experiences with as many people as possible...because I truly am happy. I love what I am doing, more than any other journey I have ever embarked on in my life. I want everyone to be as happy as I am, to know what it feels like. How you get to this point of happiness is up to you...and I hope with all my heart that you can do that for yourself. One way that I know I can feel such happiness in my heart is through serving others. Helping other people feels so good! Try to find ways to perform small deeds for others...and you will start to feel just as good (or even better) as those you help.
Why am I so happy when I have no money or no bag to carry things? I know that I am walking side by side with my Savior...and I couldn`t be more excited for the path that I am...I know I am in the right place, and I am constantly grateful for all of the people in my life that have helped me along the way in so many different ways...you are all so wonderful, and I love you all. Thank you so much for being there for me...and thinking of me. I hope my words reach you in a positive way, and you can feel at least the smallest part of the light that I know is surrounding me. I am just filled with love and happiness...there is no better feeling. Please, send addresses, and such, and I will do the best I can to talk to as many people as possible...you are all amazing, and I want to know how you are doing.
This first month has been heavenly. Truly. I am more than estactic for the months to follow.
Con amor, Hna. Jessica Scott
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